Size Charts

What size are you? Grab and donut and see below...

Small - 4 to 6 

Medium - 6 to 8

Large - 8 to 10

X Large- 10 to 12 

XXL- Bigger than X Large


I would never want to return my shirt because I love it so much, but if it's too big, what should I do?

Eat a donut.

Do you accept returns? 

Sometimes, but please have a good reason for us to put down our wine. 

Is "I don't like it" a good reason?


I love what you do and I love your shirts/ hats... How can I help spread the word?

Leave a review under the product you purchased....and maybe a joke:)

Is there anything I need to know about your shirts/ hats?

They are so soft you'll feel like you're getting a hug, they won't be a size smaller after you wash them and they're gluten free.

Who makes your shirts?

My mom stitches them all by hand in my basement. 

Will this shirt show off my mom underwear when I reach for cans up high at my grocery store? 

It shouldn't. How big is your underwear? All of our shirts run long to avoid uncomfortable exposure to your belly.

When I bend over will this shirt show that weird gap in my jeans and, again, show my mom underwear?

Hopefully not. Please stop asking us about your underwear.

Which is your favorite shirt?

We love them all, just like my children.  (But if I was drunk I'd tell you I love my son and the Classic OFM shirt best.)

How long will it take to get my shirt/hat?

If we have it in stock, it will usually ship out the next day or so.

I haven't received my shirt yet....what's up?

Sometimes we run out. There are lots of crazy, drunk ladies out there wanting One Funny Mother apparel.  We are also testing new shirt designs in small quantities. We're not Amazon, okay. My mom can only stitch so fast. 

I think I've waited long enough...I'm about to email someone using CAPITAL LETTERS. Is that a good idea?


What can I do to calm down my brain that knows it ordered a shirt and just wants some reassurance?

Email us at The OFM team will be happy to assist you, using lower case letters. 

Does Dena ever sleep?

She is basically a vampire.

I heard Carpool Rachel has a great recipe for Brussel Sprouts, can you share it?

No. Brussel Sprouts are gross.

Is this a real company or do you guys make all this shit up?

Yes and yes. 

Who is this Larry you keep referring to? 

The man.

I have an idea for a shirt...who should I tell? 

Yo mamma.

Is that a "for real" answer?

That's what she said.

Did you write these FAQ's while you were drunk on a plane?

Yes. How did you know?

For real, I'd like to give you an idea for a shirt and I do not wish to receive compensation in any way. I think the world needs more funny shirts for women with bra rolls. Where should I send my idea?






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